And She Watches
by Somewei
Summary: Drabble, Oneshot, HHr  If she never knew him, she'd be safe and away from harm. She wouldn't be breaking rules or putting her life in danger. But...if she didn't know him, then she wouldn't be really living...would she?


_**Author's Notes: **_Yes, yes, I know. There will be _no _Harry/Hermione shippings in the book, but you know what? BLAH TO YOU! LOL! Just kidding. But on a more serious note, you RHr shippers have the books. Let me peacefully have my fanfiction. Yeah so…

Anyway, I thought up this idea randomly and just went with it. Yes, it's an HHr fanfic, but I wanted to everything to perspective for Hermione. What would have happened if she didn't know Harry or what if she didn't get involved with him? What if they _never _became friends? A lot of things would have been different if she didn't meet her best friend! So…here it is!

_**Timeline: **_Probably during _GoF _

* * *

**And She Watches **

_Somewei_

"_**If I never knew you,  
**__**I'd be safe, but half as real…**_

_**And I'm so grateful to you,  
**__**I'd have lived my whole life through,  
**_…_**Empty as the sky…  
**_…_**Never knowing why…  
**_…_**Lost forever…  
**_…_**If I never knew you…"**_

_-- Pocahontas and/or The Cheetah Girls _

She was doing it again.

She was staring at him while he slept. It's not like she meant to do it nor did she plan it. She didn't call him into study sessions so she could stare at him, admiring him, while he slept. It's just…happened. She would stop working and then look to see what Harry was doing before she was swept up in all his glory. She would examine him and analyze him. It was almost the only time she had to do it. Most people swarmed him all day by either sneering at him or ask him ridiculous questions, but Hermione never truly had that chance to be with her best friend.

It was only late at night, when the two were alone after a hard day's work, that she got the chance to analyze him, to appreciate him. And while she examined him, she thought about their friendship. She would smile when she thought of all the times he came to their rescue or frown when she thought about all the rash decisions he would make. But all in all, she would smile at what an adventurous life she was turning out to have since she met him.

When she first got her letter, she was shocked and delighted at the same time. She could hardly believe that she had been picked to go to Hogwarts and learn magic. She used to read tales (the classics) about magic and imagined herself casting spells and reading the ancient spell books of witches before her. And when she got to Hogwarts, she imagined locking herself up in the library for hours and studying. She imagined cheering for her own Quidditch team when they won the Quidditch cup, seeing the Great Hall decorated in Gryffindor colors and feasting alongside her classmates peacefully.

She didn't imagine herself going through various trials alongside Harry and Ron to get the Sorcerer's Stone, or getting petrified by a huge Basilisk, or rescuing an innocent convict from Azkaban or helping Harry out in the Triwizard Tournament.

And that's what brought the thoughts up. What if she never knew him? What if she never became friends with Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley? What if she never got to know them? What if she never did any of the things she did during her years here at Hogwarts thus far?

_For one_, she thought humorously, _I wouldn't be breaking at least fifty rules every year._

If she never knew them, she wouldn't have been nearly strangled by Devil's Snare. She wouldn't have spent a majority of her second year in bed, petrified by a giant snake. She wouldn't have been put in danger thousands of times because she was helping Sirius escape the Dementors and Aurors. She wouldn't have traveled back in time throughout her third year (well, maybe she would have...) nor would she have howled to distract a dangerous werewolf. She wouldn't have had all these horrid rumors about her and Harry circulating. She wouldn't have to juggle the bitter feelings of Ron towards Harry or the angry feelings Harry had towards the school.

Yes, she concluded, she would be a lot safer if she didn't know the boys. She wouldn't have nearly lost her life multiple times. She probably would, in fact, not be sitting here next to Harry as he slept peacefully. She would be upstairs getting a good night's rest, not worrying about whether or not her best friend will live through the next trial. Not worrying about when Ron will get over himself and talk to Harry again.

She chuckled quietly. Her parents wouldn't worry either. Of course, they only know the bare minimum of what she did every year. Maybe if she didn't know the boys, she wouldn't have to conceal the truth from her parents at what she was really doing at school instead of the woven lies she created. She wouldn't have to smile at them and say she went to the teacher when there was trouble even though that was a complete lie. If she didn't know the boys, she wouldn't have to lie to her parents.

And most importantly…she wouldn't be caught up in the middle of the war between Harry and Voldemort. In fact, she or her parents wouldn't be in the way of immediate danger if she never got to know Harry. Why? Because Voldemort wouldn't know of her existence. And because Voldemort didn't know of her existence, she probably wouldn't be one of the top priorities on Voldemort's list because he wouldn't truly know _who _Hermione Granger was.

And it was at this moment that she realized that knowing Harry was dangerous. Being his friend, overall, was dangerous. If you were friends with Harry Potter, you were in the line of fire. One had to be ready to risk _everything _to be friends with Harry Potter because once you were associated with him, you were on a (and she was certain there was one) list of who to use against Harry. And she probably wouldn't be one of the top people on that list.

Perhaps, she thought as she glanced at her best friend again, it was best if she didn't know Harry. Not only would she be safe, but he would as well. She couldn't be used against him.

She closed her books and stood up. She walked over to him and examined every inch of him. His face was covered in scraps, cuts and bruises from his rigorous training in Quidditch and his trials in the Triwizard Tournament. His glasses, as usual, were at the bottom of his nose and his eyelids concealed his emerald eyes. He was sleeping peacefully, unaware of all the troubles.

Hermione smiled. Those nights were rare. The nights when he slept peacefully were treasured because they were so very few nights. He usually got a peaceful nights rest when he was truly exhausted and she knew he _was _extremely exhausted. Everything was being drained out of him this year. Luckily she had him to help him with his homework and his trials.

And soon her smile was wiped from her face.

Perhaps…perhaps…it wasn't wise to not know Harry? Although she wouldn't be in immediate danger if she didn't know him, how much more danger would she be in if she didn't know him? Or how much longer would the school be in danger if she didn't know him? After all, it _was _she who discovered that it _was _a Basilisk terrorizing the school in second year.

She sat back in her seat again and closed her eyes. She would never forgive herself if anything happened to Harry just because she didn't know him. But it wasn't just the fact that Harry would be in danger if she didn't know him…it was so much more.

Hermione sighed heavily. While she taught Harry and Ron about their subjects in school, Harry didn't realize how much _he _taught _her_. It wasn't academic, but her best friend taught much more important lessons in life to her. She smiled softly at the thought.

…What would she do without her best friend?

Before she was friends with Harry, she was uptight, prudish and rather annoying (though she won't admit that out loud). She didn't know how to live. Sure, she knew that her life had been in danger so many times because she was helping Harry, but without that danger she wouldn't have been taught to live. She knows that life can be taken away at any moment and she treasures her life and the lives of others more preciously now because of her friendship to Harry.

If she never knew Harry…she wouldn't be Hermione. She didn't care what others said about them. Her best friend made her complete. If she didn't know Harry, she would merely be the empty shell of what would be Hermione Granger. She would be defenseless, lost and alone in a world full rage and fear.

Yes, she was in danger at every moment, but she knew that that didn't matter. Harry was her protector, her friend, her mentor…and that was all that mattered. She lived because of him and she lived to the fullest. She was not alone, defenseless or lost merely because she knew Harry. So yes, she was in danger, but she was in a safe danger. As contradicting as it sounded, it made perfect sense to her.

Hermione laughed to herself as she came to this realization. Not knowing Harry would probably be the most horrid experience and adventure ever! She safe because he was safe.

"'Mi…what are you doing up?" Harry's slurred words came at her. She smiled softly at her.

"Thinking," She murmured.

She watched as he wiped the sleep from his eyes and placed his heavy textbook to the side. He stretched and yawned before he relaxed in his disheveled state and she just watched. After a couple of seconds, he looked up and noticed her staring at him. He rose an eyebrow at her and asked, "What's wrong?"

She shook her head, giggling to herself. She stood up and then threw her arms around him. He was bewildered at the sudden action of his best friend, but didn't question her. She must have come to some sort of revelation and this was the reason why she was acting this way. He dumbly placed her arms around her and she whispered into his ear, "Thank you…"

Harry, confused, nonetheless smiled and murmured, "You're welcome…"

"_**If I never knew you,  
**__**If I never felt this love,  
**__**I would have no inkling of,  
**__**How precious life can be**_

_**And if I never held you,  
**__**I would never have a clue  
**__**How at least I find in you  
**__**The missing part of me…"**_

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_**Author's Notes:**_

Just a short one-shot I did late at night because I was bored and I am really obsessing over HHr for some reason or another. Anyway, **please don't flame **if you don't like the pairing or if you think the story sucks. I know it's confusing but it was basically kind of like Hermione just getting her thoughts down. Thoughts, as you know, are _not _organized. Yeah…whatever…

_Hugs and Kisses,_

_Somewei_


End file.
